i realize that we all have specific interests but... am i alone in this?
I asked on IG: "What interests you right now?"
Payton said the exact thing that's been occupying my time over the last few months (and before pandemic to be honest) too. I'm not sure what kinda weird shit Payton is into but I'm here today to tell you all about the weird shit I'm into, and also what I'm not into but watch anyway.
I'm taking a quick look at my history on YouTube and I'll break it all down from most recent until whenever I feel like I should stop:
1. Dead people things. Including: Past lives, past life regression (a bunch of videos of Dr. Brian Weiss that I found from Oprah's old shows), reincarnation
This one apparently had me down a mini rabbit hole on Sunday... there's 13 videos in my history about this on just that day alone, but I know I've been down this hole many times before. This is something I'm genuinely curious about and have VERY seriously considered booking an appointment for. The issue is that I'm highly skeptical but also very broke. And then there's the issue of finding someone who's actually certified and not someone who's gonna scam me. And now the added issue of the pandemic and non-essential services and whatnot.
I've always been interested in the afterlife (I guess pre-life too?) and reincarnation and mediumship and all that. I've been to a few hypnotism shows but it's so hard to know what's real and what's staged. I want to believe in all these things 100% of the way but they're the kinds of things that you just can't until it happens to you.
2. YouTube drama, tea/scandals, updates...
This one isn't as self-explanatory as the first. I've seen videos of people "exposing" things about Bella Thorne surrounding the OnlyFans scandal or the music video for her song called Stupid Fucking Bitch and the video that Tana Mongeau did reacting to it. There's also Lia Marie Johnson from YouTube back in the day who went down a mental/non-sober spiral last year and the year before and then she disappeared, so I've seen some videos about updates on her or watched some of the IG Lives that she did that people uploaded to analyze. Tea channels pop up every now and again but I don't really pay too much attention to em. This category is mostly when I'm SO bored and have nothing else to watch.
3. Soft White Underbelly
I have had an addiction to the videos on this channel for SO long. I haven't watched all of them - I choose which ones I watch based on the photo of the person in the thumbnail. The first one I ever watched and have been trying to keep up with is Lin. She used to be a meth addict and now she's homeless, but there aren't been any updates on her in almost a year so I fear she's dead, missing, or in jail. The most recent one I watched was one about inbred family, the Whitakers. That one is filmed really differently from the others but was super interesting. Pretty much anything in the realm of psychology and mental illnesses I will watch (not just from that channel): Jesy Nelson (Little Mix)'s mental health journey; the psychology of Effy Stonem's style (Skins) which led to a bunch of videos about how society glamourizes eating disorders (Skinny Kids by Real Stories, as well as Girls Alone and Boys Alone by the same channel); Men reading sexual assault testimonies from survivors... etc.
4. Crime: Solved cases, unsolved mysteries...
I went down another hole earlier this month watching 911 videos from people who are trying to officially escape from their captor or who have just remembered who they were after being brainwashed for so long... I watched an interview where Amanda Barry reunites with the man who helped her escape her kidnapper's home for the first time since she escaped. Also, a bus beheading eyewitness describing the scene on the Greyhound bus... "Unforgiven: The Boys Who Killed a Child" documentary about Jamie Bulger killing a literal toddler... I'd say this category takes up 99% of my suggested videos and history......... same on Netflix.
5. The rest?
I think the remainder of things for the most part fall under hair tutorials, and catching up on the people I've subscribed to over the years. Then there's the occasional weird shit that comes up like a news segment about a woman who was missing for years who was found alive floating at sea, makeup tutorials from different generations, music videos, celebrity interviews from the 60s and earlier... Random shit I tell ya!
I would say it would be a scary place in my mind, but that isn't entirely true. Maybe I'm just good at compartmentalizing (bad thing? lol) or I am very organized up in there where you can't tell which part of my brain is dedicated to whatever interest I have... I think at face value my mind is made up of jokes and lighthearted things because something has to counter the darkness that occupies my time (LOL I'm not that dark I swear, I'm just interested in the dark).
What other interests do you have? Are you a serial killer obsessed person too? Just me? ok...
xx ♡ S
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